Audri has been taking her first steps for the past 2 weeks - she is getting really good at walking back and forth between her dad and I although she likes to dive more then walk. Her little physical therapy sessions have paid off. She also sleeps better which is nice...except the nights she is cutting teeth - then she screams like a banshee...which I guess we can put up with because she is such a good baby at all other times. I finally took her 11mth photos just in time to turn around and take her 1 yr photos.
Aspen is a huge help - and she's been doing really great on managing her whining since we started back on schedule of tracking her job chart and rewards. Hope we get on top of that this year. She is loving me reading Harry Potter out loud to her. Her dad got her the 1st book for Christmas and she is "loving all the detailed words - it makes the pictures in my head so clear" I love her! We had a struggle there getting along for a while and she drove me crazy for a while - but I do love her sweet spirit.
I've been feeling a little down lately. Maybe because things are slowing down after my three months of solid photoshoots - now I only have 2 this month and not much next mth. It's always slow during this time- it will pick up in the spring. And having my computer not working has left me too much thinking time. And way too much time on facebook - I am going to have to give facebook up - again - I did it once before where I was only using it to update my marketing - and it was so nice to not get mixed up in all the facebook drama - facebook is almost like a soap opera. Anyway - there really is one thing that I'm always reading on there that really gets me down. And I can't put my finger on exactly why it bothers me so much.
I am not vaccinated. My mother didn't vaccinate me as a child because I was a sick little baby all the time and the Dr. told her it would be better to wait until I was older. Except she never vaccinated me when I was older. And I never got anything more then the chicken pox-which there was no vaccine for and I lived through - and whooping cough - which is a scary sounding thing - but again - I lived through it. My mom told me that when I turned 18 I could decide for myself by praying and studying about vaccines what I wanted to do. Well, I did that - and I decided that if ever I had the feeling I should get vaccinated - I would. Well, I never had that feeling with all my praying, and so I never have - except to get a hepatitis one when I worked with mentally disabled children - in case they bit me...
Anyway let me back up a little. This decision was not made lightly, it was made with a lot of prayer and research. And I had to depend on how I felt about what I read - if it felt "right" or "wrong". Growing up I felt like a freak. I was the only kid that I knew of in grade school that was "different" and didn't have vaccines. As I got older I would beg my parents for vaccines because I didn't want to be "different" from everyone else - from all my friends. I was afraid they looked at me like I was a germ....like I could give them something. Sadly this feeling has come back being associated with facebook. I once again often read a post that points out how wrong non vaccers are and I feel like a freak again for believing the way I do. Let me point out that I am not against vaccines nor do I not believe they can be of help. I don't vaccinate my children at birth-or the first 2 years- - but I did do some vaccines for Aspen when she was 2 - I spread them out and gave them slowly and picked the ones I felt were right for her - I didn't just do them all because that's what the Dr. wanted me to do - I studied them out and weighed my decisions. Audri will have the same course of action taken with her - and maybe she will end up with ones that Aspen didn't have - I don't know at this point yet - but I sure will do the same studying and praying for her that I did for Aspen. And being made to feel like I'm a bad mom and putting my children in harms way really bothers me. To know that if my children ended up with anything someone would point their finger at me and say it was my fault - bothers me.
Here is the thing. Everyone wants to point out how vaccines have saved the world - and I am not discounting the good they have provided - not by any means - I am sure that they have helped a number of problems in a big way- but people want to say that science has proved it - so that's why they really are the cure all- and how science has proved that not vaccinating can cause everyone to get these deadly diseases...although if that's the case I'm surprised we don't hear about more diseases all over. But back to my point here. If you believe in God then you know that some Science has also proven that God doesn't exist. Well - I know that to be false - so to me science can't always be right.
There are so many stories of people who have not been vaccinated that have gotten one of the diseases - sometimes over coming it - sometimes dying from it - sometimes being deformed from it - there are also the same number of stories about those who have been vaccinated who have gotten one of the diseases after getting the vaccine - sometimes overcoming it - sometimes dying from it-sometimes being deformed from it. Some reports state higher cases in those unvaccinated - some reports state higher cases in those vaccinated - the problem is that they could all be true or they could all be lies. Just because science has "proven" it does not mean it is 100% true - or the same goes for God - he can't exist if science is 100% true. At least these are all the thoughts that go through my mind on all these topics. I really try to refrain from commenting most the time on these posts because #1 - I do a lot of photography for the hospital and I am not sure how they would feel about my thoughts - and #2 I don't like contention. It's almost impossible to change someone's mind on the topic.
I know 100% that there could come a day when I could end up with one of the diseases since I am not vaccinated. I also know 100% that if I did get the vaccines - there is still a chance - maybe a small one-but still a chance I could end up with one of the diseases - or have something bad happen to me that would make it so I couldn't function anymore - but I'm not really afraid either way. If I never feel like I should get vaccinated, I won't - and if I feel someday that I should - I will. And if I end up with something and everyone wants to shout "told you so" then that was my choice and I will live with it.
I just hate reading posts that feel like they are attacking my choices-or other non vaccers choices - and it goes both ways - non vaccers should not attack those who choose to vaccinate. I wish we could all just accept that we are all different and all handle things differently and that we are ok that way. I'm ok with you getting vaccines - can't you be ok with me not getting vaccines? If you don't want me around your baby because the sign says "not vaccinated - no kisses" then by all means just tell me you are weary that I'm not vaccinated and that when your baby has it's vaccines then I can see it. :) I can respect you for that.
Anyway - that is my soap box about vaccines. I'm not here to convince anyone to be for or against them - but to do the research and prayers yourself and decide what's right for you and your family. What's right for me may not be what's right for you. And we should all be able to respect each others choices.
No comments:
Post a Comment